tis has been thinking since last year.
hav not forgotten or erase in me mind.
but i does affects me feelings.
i hav been keeping it since long ago.

Situation:

noticed that they hav been getting most of the things that they want to hav and want to do.
as for me, will be getting it if im LUCKY.
sometimes i kept on askin myself if they are being fair to me.
but im i dont want to make tis situations more worst.
i dont want to let them to think more bad things.
as they are happy getting those things, im juz there staring like as if i dont know about it.
but i would be thinking....
"Hmmm.... i hav tis and he/she hav tis more. Hmph! Nvm"
i would even go into my room and express out my feelings and thoughts privately if its too much to see... or even blog it.
tears of fury and blues.
pretending that there is nothing happened
the feelings is really uncontrollable and sometimes will end the next blazing day
this wont even end unless u hav the determination to accomplish the situations
i even hope and prayed that i would have this things and do this things.


My Conclusion:

but still, whenever i see them soo happy, i cant do those things.
i dont want them to feel more upset and dont wanna be selfish towards them.
cause if they are happy, im happy too.
at least i hav something.
better than nothing rite?
i would juz say....
"Gico, its ok! they are happy, im happy! there will be next time again. juz nid to be PATIENT."
not only i should think of myself but the others too.
we may have the things that we hav now that they dont hav rite now.
plus, i should appreciate of wad people gav us and put myself in others shoes.
i dont hav to influence by them if they did it to me.
its my choice to do those actions.
the choices are in my hands and i hav to choose wisely.
though its difficult to handle, its the benefit of the others and myself too in the future.
sometimes, we hav to make a decision to make this accomplish to be stronger.


My Wish:

juz hoping that soon i will get what im craving at.
and hope for the best the following days
hoping that you all will understand me.